Maze

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I wish I could show you the unread pages that contains all of me. I want to tell you everything…..about my feelings for you but at the same time I never want the pieces of my broken heart to reach to you. I want to know your reply, your reaction when you hear the deepest of my secrets but at the same time I just want you to stand at the shore and never come close to me. It’s this dilemma that is killing me. I don’t know where I stand….I don’t know what I want. The sand in my hand keeps on slipping but I can do nothing to stop it. I don’t know if its just attraction or more than that but I know that the answer I’ll find to all my questions will just bring vain and agony to my heart. I just stand here in hoping on a silver lining that all of this will be over one day but day by day, the certainty becomes hazy. I had a clear vision for my dreams but I never calculated these obstructions. A part of me wants to be with you but another wants to run away as far as it can because you are both a poison and a medicine to my heart. You are both a curse and a boon for me. I thought that running away was a better option but I just find myself falling deeper and deeper in this ocean of feelings. I feel myself captivated in the rainbow of sadness and broken heart. I’m lost in the maze of my sadness and no matter which way I turned, it is a wrong way. I find myself coming back to the place from where I’ve started. I wonder if you are going through same emotions, if your love is deeper than mine. In this solitude, I find my thoughts tracing back to you. I want to find myself, the true me…..but all I end up finding is a void in my heart that could only be filled by you.

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